Week 10

I might as well keep all (all two) of you informed on my progress. I'm thinking of turning it into some quasi messed up pregnancy calendar. Maybe sometime in the far away future someone will discover it for a good chuckle. Well, on to Week 10:

MHL (miniature humanoid life form) will be considered a fetus by the end of the week, and weighs as much as two 22 Win Mag TNT Green ammo, and is about as long as one and a half bullets. These particular bullets are also lead free… for baby’s safety. While MHL is relatively small, it is growing rather rapidly. It's growing eyelids and getting less "webby" and more baby. It's also starting to form boy or girl parts, though we wont know which until 20 weeks.

 I am starting to look more actually pregnant and less suspiciously fat. I am still tired, ALL THE TIME. Three more weeks and hopefully magical energy will appear… I am skeptical… Most of my other symptoms are gone... for now *knock on wood*.....

Everyone Poops.... Air

It's one of those symptoms you don't find many preggos sharing out loud...constipation.... Hormones are making everything all loosey goosey down there, which you would think would mean massive diarrhea. No...because it actually takes a good amount of muscle work to move your...*ahem*.. stool, out your bottom. So loosey goosey muscles= no movement of your bowels. But you’re still eating, because Lord are you hungry. At least I am. Right around every two hour mark, my stomach is playing me the song of its people. So loudly that people miles away are wondering what that whale like sound is... it's my stomach. So all that food + lack of bowel movement = righteous preggo lady gas.

So the other evening, as the Sergeant and I are getting tucked in for the night, I meekly apologize for any gas I might have

Me: I am really sorry, I have been soo gassy all day
Sarg: That's ok sweetheart...everyone poops
Me: *Silent* (thinking I said gassy...not pooping...I mean, I am not planning to poop the bed...)
Sarg: ..Everyone poops..Air...It's like pooping air...(very serious voice mind you)
Me: giggling and gassing for several minutes

Progress Updated

Week nine... miniature humanoid life form is still inhabiting my body....I am exhausted, a little barfy, and waiting for the magical mystical energy increase that supposedly comes with the second trimester. Baby Trott is roughly the size of a .22 caliber bullet. Sorry, there will be no fruit references from me...

Special Blend

  


               I've been meaning to post, but I have been stuck in this sleeping beauty like coma, minus the beauty part. Man! This growing a human being business is exhausting. The crummy part right now is I just look fat and not pregnant yet so the whole sympathy from strangers when I look sick, exhausted, starving, gassy, ditsy or delirious is rather minimal. One of my co workers jokes we need to get  me a shirt that says :I'm not just fat, I'm pregnant!"

During my pre pregnancy obsession, I did so much reading on "What to Expect" and all of the "Signs and Symptoms" of pregnancy. There ARE SO MANY!

• Morning sickness (or all days sickness as most prior preggos know it)
• Exhaustion, varying from a little sleepy to out cold
• Extra hungry, cravings
• Aversions to foods and smells
• Heightened sense of smell
• Acne
• Rashes, skin discoloration (not including your nips, cause that happens anyway), skin tags
• Constipation
• Lethal farts
• The where am I? Who is that? and how did I get here? Pregnancy brain.
• Loss of coordination
• Cramping that scares the hell out of you
• Swelling up like a balloon if you are taking in too much salty goodness
• And that is just the short list.....

Am I glad I read all of the articles about these different symptoms? Yes, because at least I knew what could happen. But I took it with a grain of salt, and so should you. Every woman's pregnancy symptoms are her own special blend, and from what I have read, that blend varies from pregnancy to pregnancy with the same woman. You may be like me, who can hardly keep her eyes open,everything smells like it is right up my nose, and I am also beginning to "lose it" a little with what is going on around me. But I have to say, the sickness has been pretty minimal.

What is or was your special blend of pregnancy? (Just a note: If you say you had loads of energy and felt soooooo amazing all the time I will judo chop you in the throat. Just saying...)